I spent my Friday night like most single girls in their twenties would: Alone, watching Dateline and eating an entire bag of lettuce.
Saturday, my friend came over to my place before we went out. She insisted I change out of my “Celeste uniform” (Jeans, tank top, and TOMS) and into something girlier. Had I known we’d end up at Portland’s biggest meat market, I would have worn a tube top and a banana hammock.
We started off at one of my favorite bars, Henry’s, where I drank umpteen vodka sodas. Don’t worry, I softened the drunk blow by eating a veggie burger and side salad. I finally got buzzed enough to agree to go to Dixie, Portland’s premier night club… You can already tell where my night started to go wrong.
We showed up there and I immediately felt under-dressed and over-aged. The 18 year-old bar tenders dancing on the bar in daisy dukes and cut off tops didn’t help either. I still managed to have a decent amount of fun and danced like the white girl with no rhythm I was born to be.
Sunday morning did not greet me well. I hung out on my couch and waited for the vegan place to open up at noon. I actually called at 11:30 to place my order, and then waited at their door until they opened like a hobo in line for the soup kitchen. Based on my order (curry, wanton soup, spring rolls, and carrot cake), I’m sure he was expecting a small family to show up. I got home, put on my elastic waist-band, and destroyed it:
If you’re curious, that’s some 1980 Diane Keaton movie in the background. That was after I watched my entire Disney DVD collection. Clearly, it was a super productive day.
I had a Doctor’s appointment on Tuesday, so I went and got pizza afterward at Pizzicato. They have this amazing vegan pizza so I ate outside and, unsurprisingly, polished off the entire thing. I was still hungry after I got back from the gym, so I ate half a tub of hummus just with a spoon…
Last night was definitely my low point in the week. I skipped the gym and ate a HUGE serving of pad thai with a side of salad rolls. But oh no, that wasn’t enough to quiet the beast, so I warmed up a frozen vegan pizza I had in my freezer and ate that too. I woke up incredibly dehydrated from all the sodium… I chugged some water and avoided the mirror.
I took this picture on Saturday morning after my run, when I still thought I could make something out of the weekend:
Funny MAX conversation of the week:
Stoner: “Why do you have an umbrella in your backpack?”
Me: “It’s Portland. Gotta be prepared.”
Stoner: “Yeah, that’s why I always keep a Pop Tart in my bag.”
(Pulls it out and starts eating it.)
Me: “Yeah, I guess that’s the same thing.”