I’d thought I’d start off this post with a quick cooking tip: When baking salmon, don’t use your bare hand to take it out of the oven. It may result in several blisters all over your fingers. Just a little something to put in your back pocket for future cooking endeavors.
Last weekend I went out on a friend’s sail boat to watch the Rose Festival fireworks and drink a beer or 12. Afterward, I met up with another friend for margaritas and Mexican food. The fajitas I had were delicious but any joy I was experiencing from the meal was short lived when I tripped and fell over my chair leg in front of the ENTIRE restaurant. I should also add that I had several stains on my hoodie from the complimentary chips and salsa they give before the meal. I made us leave immediately after that so I didn’t have to sit and wallow in my embarrassment. I really shouldn’t be allowed out in public.
It was “National Kid’s Day” at work on Wednesday. I walked in to steal some free popcorn from the little kids and over heard Bubbles the Clown asking where the “Little clown’s room” was… I admire her for not breaking character.
My dinner on Wednesday night was crackers dipped in A1 Steak Sauce. I shit you not. My love affair with A1 goes back to when I was a kid and would dip uncooked spaghetti in it as a snack. I’d drink the stuff right out of the bottle… Okay, I HAVE drank it right out of the bottle.
I went to the grocery on Thursday and got really excited to see that blueberries were in season. I decided to get the biggest container they had and proceeded to accidentally dump the entire thing in my basket as I was checking out. I tried to help clean up by pouring the basket back into the container and blueberries went everywhere, all over the conveyor belt and floor. The check out lady asked me to please stop and said she would have someone get me a new one. Like I said, I shouldn’t be allowed in public.
Later that night was when shit really got sad. I ate an entire box of Cheez-Its followed by a Lean Pocket and brownie. I was unstoppable and full of Sodium.
This Friday I went to Zoo Brew and got inebriated next to monkeys and elephants. I can honestly say that’s a first.
I spent all day Saturday on my friend’s sailboat again and drank umpteen beers. We decided to head back to their place so they could cook us a delicious meal. I would have enjoyed more of the cooked food had I not stuffed my face with BBQ chips dipped in Sour Cream. Who the hell does that? Sour cream? Really, Celeste?